Journey to Narnia

Hey, all. Beautiful weather here after another hot spell. I'm sitting out on the lanai, and it's 67 degrees with a nice breeze blowing through the condo.  An Omaha Steaks chuck roast is in the oven with potatoes, carrots, and onions and is starting to smell mighty good. (Sister) Dawn and I are glad we're not up in the Northeast contending with winter storm Stella. STELLA! STELLLAAA! We also note the folks back home in Wisconsin had about a 5-6 incher earlier this week. March can be a real bitch up in Cheeseland.

OK, today for the first time in my life, I went to a Costco. Just to gaze, gawk, to look with wonder upon the 30-roll cases of Kirkland toilet paper, the 5-pound jars of pickles, and the 3-pound pans of heat-and-eat lasagna. And, yes, a "Breitling Chronomat 44" automatic chronograph watch for $5,800 (retail $8,670).

To be clear, I'm not a Costco member. Just contemplating at this point, with a little help and advice from (niece) Kris.

I wasn't totally unprepared for what I would see, having toured a Sam's Club in Janesville a few years back with (friend) Amy. But this Costco made Sam's look like a Seven-Eleven by comparison. I thought for a moment I had slipped into Narnia, the fantasy world created by C.S. Lewis of "Alice in Wonderland" fame. First of all, the place was jammed with people shuttling around jumbo shopping carts and even those wheeled platform trucks like you see at Lowes and Home Depot. One of the first thing I passed was a rack of brochures offering Costco-branded services:

• Travel packages. How about a 15-day "Best of Italy and Sicily" tour for $3,285 per person, based on double occupancy. 
• Home and auto insurance.
• Dental and vision plan.
• Home mortgages.

Next, there was a cafeteria (not just a snack bar) where singles, couples, and even whole families were having lunch or sipping coffee. Many with no shopping carts (that I could see), just folks eating and drinking as though it were an outing to Applebees or Denny's.

This is before I even got to the grocery and general merchandise aisles. I'm only thinking of joining Costco to save some bucks on staple items, like laundry, paper, trash bags, coffee, and a few other things. But, holy cow, if you really want to get into this (and many people obviously do), then Costco can become a lifestyle! Seriously, the only thing missing is prepaid funeral services, and I wouldn't doubt that the company is considering this also.

So anyway, the annual membership fee is $55. I snapped a few photos of products I use and will compare them to Walmart, Aldi (in Janesville) and so forth. And by the way, the Breitling chronograph is no bargain at $5,800. You can buy the same watch online from any of a dozen sources for around $4,000!

Dishwasher tablets (just as cheap as Walmart, by the way)

As an alternative, (niece) Kris has offered to purchase for me a "Costco Cash Card" (fancy name for a gift card) which a nonmember (me) can use to get into the store (they check for membership cards at the entrance) and buy stuff.

Oh, one last thing. This particular Costco had a rack full of discounted gift cards to other retail and food establishments. You could, for example, buy two $50 gift certificates to Flemings Steakhouse or Buco de Beppo and other sub establishments, and pay $80. Wow!

The other interesting thing I did this past week was take a bus trip to the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Hollywood, Florida. There is a tour company in town (AllStar Charters) that for $35 will provide bus transportation to and from the casino, and you get $20 of that back in "free play" for slot machines on a player's card, which you obtain at the casino. After playing one slot machine and a few hands of $10 blackjack, I was $11 ahead, so I quit gambling and spent the remaining five hours touring the hotel and casino, which included checking out all the cool rock-n-roll memorabilia on display. Some really neat stuff, from the early days of Bill Haley and Chuck Berry, right up to Jennifer Lopez and Adele. Also had two great meals (breakfast and lunch) at the Blue Plate, one of the casino's multiple eateries. Also passed some time at the hotel's coffee bar called the Constant Grind, much like a Starbucks. Free wi-fi, also. All in all, an enjoyable day, and a fun diversion. Left Fort Myers 7 a.m., got back at 6:15 p.m. It's not the "Big M" cruise casino of years past (which I really miss, by the way), but it's a decent substitute and satisfies the occasional gambling urge.

Bye for now.

Bruce